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Joke of the Day
"I met an urban dwarf who keeps perfect time. He's a metronome."
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"? Hey there Delilah, for your word spell Mississippi ""May I have the definition?"" The state siblings can get frisky ? and cousins toooo ?"
"If Donald Trump becomes president and keeps up his shenanigans, he could be the first president to be impeached. It would be an un-presidented event in American politics."
"I tried to teach a class on how hard it is to make a Fibonacci Sequence. But it spiraled WAY out of control!"
"The Chicken or The Egg A chicken and an egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette. The egg rolls over in satisfaction and says, ""Well, I guess we answered that question."""
"What does a blonde put behind her ears to look attractive? Her ankles."
"A man walks into his therapist's office wearing nothing but Saran Wrap.. so the therapist takes one look at the man and says, ""Well, I can clearly see your nuts."""
"Why didn't the peanut butter... Fuck the jelly? Because he was already in a jam"
"Make sure your worst enemy is not living between your own two ears."
"It was so cold last night I saw a lawyer with his hands in his *own* pockets."