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Joke of the Day

"If Donald Trump becomes president and keeps up his shenanigans, he could be the first president to be impeached. It would be an un-presidented event in American politics."

"Why didn't the tree get any presents for Christmas? He was knotty."

"What is the difference between a sociopath and a buddhist? A sociopath sees people as things; a buddhist sees things as people."

"I had an amazing racist joke to tell... ...but a black guy stole it."

"The world loves Apple But Apple's CEO loves banana's"

"Why do Asians have squinty eye balls? Because Atomic Bombs are pretty bright..."

"I think Bernie would win for sure if he had served in the military and reached the rank of Colonel And he would be sure to get the black vote."

"Girls must gain like a 4 point bump after you've had a few drinks. Cause I'm in a bar in Greece, and these dames around me look like a 5 right now."

"What do you call a porno with aliens in it? A science friction movie."

"Life is like a box of chocolates. They're cheaper the day after Valentine's Day."