85129

Joke of the Day

"Why does beer go faster through you than milk? Unlike milk it doesn't have to change color. Why does Budweiser go faster through you than beer? Unlike beer it doesn't have to change taste."

Next Joke
 
"I had this really funny joke about the sun i was going to tell you all, but some bastard has made a funnier joke about the moon and totally eclipsed it."
"What do you get if you cross a newsreader and a toad ? A croaksman !"
"Everything England has accomplished has been bettered by other nations - rugby, cricket and now at football... Even the Russians have better hooligans than us."
"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, you chauvinist asshole!"
"So my friend came to me for help with his problems, but I really had to go to the bathroom... I left telling him I had shit to do, but really I had a shit to take and no shit to give."
"[hiding in pantry from murderer] [quietly tries to open bag of chips]"
"So I tried to tell a friend of mine an Isis joke... but it was poorly executed"
"What do you get when you cross a horse, an elephant, and a rhino? Helephino."
"My boyfriend is taking me to a Spanish restaurant for dinner, I'm kind of scared, I don't speak Spanish, how will I know not to order dog"