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Joke of the Day
"Live for what tomorrow has to offer, not what yesterday has taken away."
Next Joke
"How has Donald Trump managed to bankrupt so many casinos? He hits on anything twelve or higher."
"Living on earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the sun."
"Spiders have it about right. If he doesn't bring her a snack when he courts her it's curtains.."
"There once was a poet on Twitter who grew increasingly bitter. He couldn't surmount the strict character count and so his poems got even shi"
"Telling a racist joke is like getting in a car with an asian driver If they are not really good, there's a very good chance you'll crash and burn."
"(CPR class) Wife to instructor: What if my knees start to hurt? Me to instructor: See what I'm up against?"
"This is your pilot speaking. If you have any requests, please give them to the flight attendant. Anyway, here's Wonderwall."
"Just completed a 0.00 mi run - preceded by 11 oreo cookies #RunKeeper"
"[First date] Me: What do you prefer, flat or sparkling? Him: Water? Me: No, my personality."