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Joke of the Day

"Ever heard of a game called Polish Roulette? It's like Russian Roulette except all the chambers are loaded. edit: ""chambers,"" not ""barrels"""

"How do you make an epileptic dance? Throw a flashbang into the room."

"Why did the dog sleep on the chandelier? Because he was a light sleeper."

"Where do you find a dog with no legs? ...right where you put it."

"If you can't win an argument, correct their grammar."

"I found out a way to go ad - free on youtube with no adblock! Just replace the ""you"" in youtube with ""red"" in your URL and it should get rid of them, i guess they were hiding it from us or something."

"Seasonal Star Wars joke > **Darth Vader**: Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas. > **Luke**: How? > **Darth Vader**: I felt your presents. EDIT: Formatting"

"For this New Years resolution I'm not going to smoke any more weed. But I'm not gonna smoke any less either."

"Worst thing about having a daughter is... No matter how hard you try you're daughter is gonna have some other man's dick in her mouth."

"What did I do when I had a bomb strapped to me chest? Iran"