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Joke of the Day

"The Ultimate Spoiler You all die in the end."

"What did one dairy cow say to another? Got milk?"

"14-year old Becky writes ""Stop wars"" as her Facebook status. It gets nine ""likes"", all from world leaders. Peace reigns forever. She did it."

"Yes I have exams. No, I'm not easily distracted. Yes, my shadow is interesting."

"Me: Wow, you're glowing. Her: Aaaaww, thank you! Me: No, like radioactive... Her: . . . Me: Tone down the filters?"

"Why do Queenslanders call their beer, ""XXXX""? Because they can`t spell the word, beer."

"Not a lot of people know this, but if you dress up like a pirate and go into Red Lobster, you eat for free."

"Do something nice for your ex today, take them out. One bullet should do the trick."

"What's brown and white and flies all over? Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!"

"What's the difference between you and a calendar? A calendar has dates..."