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Joke of the Day

"What does an Italian... What does an Italian have when one arm is shorter than the other? A speech impediment. AY!"

"Why are germans so bad at marathons? Because they cant finish a race."

"When I was ten, my family moved to Downers Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them."

"Stupid joke I made up, 101: Where does a sandwich go when it gets good grades? Honor roll."

"How does the Terminator lose weight? By counting Kylereese."

"I was playing snooker with Jacqueline. I looked at her and said, ""Where's your cue?"" She said, ""It's after the C."""

"What do you call a chef who's stingy with herbs? PARSLEYMONIOUS"

"Beautiful women following me on Twitter is screwing up my perception of who will talk to me in RL. A trip to Walmart should fix that."

"Donald trump already has a private jet he plans on putting in production for his presidency. He's calling it the hair force one."

"Terrible news. The guy who created AMC cinema's has died. His funeral is next Friday at 2:30, 5:20 and 7:45."