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Joke of the Day
"What's Gollum's favourite food? Scallops, scallops!"
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"Q: What is it that all men have one of; it's longer on some men than on others; the Pope doesn't use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they're married? A: surname"
"How does a coffee maker know it might be pregnant? It's period is a little LATTE."
"Why do we have oceans? Because based god and acid god had a baby."
"How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. Edit: lol it flaired accurately"
"I am Looking a Bank I am Looking for a Bank which can perform Two things for me. Give me a Loan, and then Leave me Alone...."
"What do you call a pokemon with a venereal disease? A PENISSAUR!"
"So there was a fish swimming up stream and it runs into a wall... And it was like ""damn."""
"50 mph winds here and I looked out the window and saw a package of Oreos fly by my house. At this rate, I will never have to leave for food."
"I used to be a halogen but then I took a proton to the Ne"