83053

Joke of the Day

"I fucked a fat woman in an elevator.. It was wrong on so many levels"

"What happen if a bomb blasts in a bra or a man's underwear?"

"What is Jesus's go-to pickup line? Would you like me to show you what it feels like to get nailed?"

"Wanna hear an embarrassing story about the time I forgot something important? I forgot the punchline. Sorry, I haven't been this embarrassed since that one time."

"Telling a girl to calm down works about as well as trying to baptize a cat."

"Friend: ""Hey, want me to get out my didgeridoo so I can play for you?"" I'd rather you didgerididn't."

"Miss Universe pageant will be awesome when the sluts from other planets finally decide to show up."

"Did you hear the bad news about the Italian chef? He pasta way."

"You know times are hard when you call 911 for an ambulance and they tell you to have gas money ready."

"I regret buying that straight jacket. Thought it would look good on me but I just can't pull it off."