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Joke of the Day

"If I were any more hungry right now, Brad and Angelina would adopt me :("

"They say it's rude to ask a women's age... So what's your weight?"

"""Knock knock"" ""Who's there?"" And it was at that moment when Peter broke down in tears, having realized that his mother's Alzheimer disease had finally reached past the point of no return."

"What do you call a nun that sleepwalks? A Roamin' Catholic."

"there's a guy with a pt cruiser at the car wash bet it's hard to keep clean when girls are just constantly smashing their pussies against it"

"Can we just make serving unsalted french fries a federal offense?"

"What title do a sandwich and an occupation in the porn industry share? The Fluffernutter."

"I used to think that Banana Republic was actually a government run by bananas"

"Imagine if things had been reversed. We'd be eating Lou Gehrig candy bars and getting Babe Ruth's disease."

"How are making love in a boat and Coors Lite similar? They're both fucking close to water,"