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Joke of the Day
"My atheist friend let out a sneeze... ""Damn you,"" I responded."
Next Joke
"What is musical and handy in the supermarket. A Chopin Lizst."
"Given how, when I try to eat a banana, I end up holding the peel while the actual fruit falls to the floor, I'm ok never handling a firearm."
"My psychiatrist told me I need to love myself more. I was like, ""damn doc I'm already up to 3 times a day"""
"Just finished my Sexual Violence Prevention and Awareness Training. It was very informative and I feel much safer. Plus I totally raped the quiz at the end, 100%."
"[wife crosses out another baby name off the list] What? What's wrong with Carlos Danger Grenades?"
"if pointing out racism makes me a racist, then i'm going to start pointing out millionaires."
"[Reguest] Can you tell me a joke that's translatable in any language? So not jokes like the current front page: http://i.imgur.com/Hp8K3vB.png"
"What currency do they use in space? Star bucks."
"I've become quite independent since my wife left... I just put my second load of washing through the microwave."