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Joke of the Day

"TIFU by quitting my job as a train driver and downing a bottle of ketchup. I went off the rails and straight on the sauce."

"What's the difference between Hillary Clinton and Bill Clinton? Bill has had sex in the White House."

"If Trump replaces Obama as president, Orange will be the new Black."

"If Canada was a Kingdom, PM Stephen Harper would be a King... ...but Canada is a country."

"A sad time in a dad's life is when your son finally dunks on you so you have to cut his hamstring while he sleeps so he can't do it again"

"What do you call an Italian ghost? A Gabaghoul"

"What do you call a sometimes homosexual arctic bear with heavy mood swings? A Bi bipolar polar bear!"

"Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head is so far away from it's body."

"A guy named Shane can never date an Asian girl... ... Because then she would bring Shane to her family."

"Why didn't Trump drown? Because shit floats."