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Joke of the Day
"I accidentally pooed my pants in an elevator. I'm taking this shit to a whole new level."
Next Joke
"How is learning to ride a bicycle and 9/11 alike? Because you never forget!"
"You know that you have a terrible sense of humor... when you find that click-baiting is funny"
"It seems like gay guys get the most sex, lesbians get the best sex, and straight people are just fucked."
"You know what really gets on my nerves? myelin"
"1) Throw a ball of yarn into a fencing battle 2) Wait until the fight is over 3) Retrieve your fully-knitted sweater"
"Tombstones should just say how old the person was. I don't wanna walk around doing grave math."
"What's it called when you kidnap a ghost? A Polter-Heist"
"Me: Bless me father for I have sinned... Priest texting me back: I already told you, I'm not absolving u of your sins unless you come in."
"If anyone needs any morals, I have some I'm not using."