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Joke of the Day

"I'm what the kids call shitpost"

"Tweeting and grocery shopping don't mix. I've been down every aisle and just realized all I have in my cart is a cabbage and someone's baby."

"I donated $4 to Bernie's campaign I gave someone reddit gold."

"I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."

"Did you hear about the black guy who was shot 15 times? The police said it was the worst case of suicide they had ever seen."

"So there was a fish swimming up stream and it runs into a wall... And it was like ""damn."""

"I may have hit rock bottom, but the upside of being down here, is I can see up all of your skirts. As you were."

"Exaggerations... ...went up by a million percent last year."

"According to these Father's Day gift sections, all dads are clean shaven business men that love playing golf and think they're #1."

"How many introverts does it take to screw in a light bulb? Why does it have to be a group activity?"