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Joke of the Day

"SHOUT OUT TO ALL THE WEATHER REPORTERS RISKING LIFE & LIMB SO WE CAN ALL KNOW WHAT A 130MPH HURRICANE LOOKS LIKE IN THE DARK!"

Next Joke
 
"[Putting petrol in car] 19.95 19.96 19.97 [stops] [gently now] 19.98 [very gently] 19.99 [ok, once more] [deep breath] 37.83 GODDAMMIT"
"What does a Mexican Morpheus say? Neo, you are the Juan ... I'll show myself the door..."
"Advent calendars Their days are numbered."
"I'm not intimidated by a pretty woman. I'm intimidated by smart women, who happen to be pretty."
"What's the difference between snowmen and snowladies? Snowballs"
"Why did the girl put pop rocks down her pants To get that pussy poppin"
"What would Matthew McConaughey eat if he were a horse? McConaugHAY"
"Why did the turkey cross the road Her didn't want to end up near the sides. PS, happy thanksgiving"
"What does a black man do after sex? 15 years to life"
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