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Joke of the Day

"My friend drove into a tree earlier... I wonder if he's oaky"

"My Persian friend and I were having lunch... But something came up and I had Tehran."

"What's the difference between three dicks and a joke? Your momma can't take a joke."

"I'm on a seafood diet If I see food and it's a fish I eat it edit: /r/jokes is not the place for dry humor. note to self: more corn and cheese"

"I see dead people. Well technically they're stupid people, but give me a few minutes."

"I have the heart of a lion... And a lifetime ban from the Lincoln Park Zoo"

"How do you make an archaeologist blush? [repost for spelling] You hand him a dirty tampon and ask him what period it's from!"

"The only thing worse than a male chauvinistic pig is a woman that won't do as she is told."

"I was having a nightmare where a dude said he was going to kill me if I could not make him laugh... so I said... What gas leaves a pirate speechless? . . . Argon"

"My wife asks for 500$ every day wow and what does she buy with all that money ? I don't know I never give it to her."