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Joke of the Day

"A bandit walks into an old west bank... and yells, ""alright, I want all you mother stickers down on the ground - this is a fuck up!"""

"Joke (for adults) Okay, so I'm going to tell you- HEY LOOK THOSE IDIOTS THE U.S. GOVERNMENT JUST LOWERED OUR TAXES"

"'Always the bridesmaid, never the bride' is good advice for any best man."

"What did the vampire do to stop his son biting his nails ? He cut all his fingers off !"

"Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a slice of bread"

"Jews are lazy... ... essentially a group of people who couldn't be bothered to read the sequel. -Will Bailey (Cambridge footlights)"

"Why did the Austrian woman go to see a psychologist. Because she wanted a penis."

"What do crazy girlfriends and chocolate have in common? They both kill your dog"

"Dudes, how can we keep track of how long it's been since we've been on a date? I mean, women can just measure their leg hair..."

"I'm so single my cat has a cat."