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Joke of the Day

"What do a Redneck divorcee and a Tornado have in common? -- either way, you're gonna lose your trailer..."

"The last words of my gym teacher: ""All spears to me!"""

"What would you call the mailman if he got fired? I don't know, just some dude."

"Hush little baby, Don't say a word. Daddy's gonna buy you a bunch of crap so he doesn't have to hear your incessant whining ya spoiled brat."

"How do you make a Jewish philosopher have a Eureka moment? Tell him the Final Solution."

"I got my wife a plunger for her birthday... because she just LOVES bringing up old shit."

"There is a house on my street that I can't stop staring at. It's front door is especially entrancing."

"Why does Helen Keller masturbate with only 1 hand? because she is moaning with the other."

"Q: Why do blondes have little holes all over their faces? A: From eating with forks."

"How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? Eleven. One chief of police to oversee it, and 10 cops to beat the lightbulb until it wants to change."