80119

Joke of the Day

"I told my buddy that Jewish people call god by a different name He was like, ""No way!"" I was like, ""Yahweh"""

"Why do people still buy bottle openers? I just don't see the reason for purchasing a bottle opener. I've been using my seat belt for years!"

"After the Thanksgiving dinner, everyone says (-1)/8"

"At what age do kids stop remembering how often their parents are late picking them up from school because of online poker?"

"What do you call a red-headed baker? A Ginger-bread man"

"I just got a new watch for my ex-wife Seems like a fair trade."

"I'm going to run a marathon next year. It's a huge challenge, but 26 miles in 365 days is definitely doable."

"What do you get if you cross the Titanic with The Sixth Sense? Icey dead people."

"Why did the carpenter's wife leave him? He was screwing around when he was supposed to be nailing her."

"YOU ARE GROUNDED!!!! ~ me, yelling hilarious shit at the beef in this grocery store."