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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a gay bar and says... ""Whose dick do I gotta suck to suck a dick around here?"""

"There's two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says.. You man the guns, I'll drive'"

"What did the miner say when he struck gold? Au, yeah!"

"Bartender asks a returning guest... You come in everyday for the past 10 years paying for the same drink with 4 quarters. Why? The guest responds with, ""I don't like change!"""

"What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes -WHAM!- ""FUCK!"" A bad skydiver goes ""FUCK!"" -WHAM!-"

"What does a ship weigh when she leaves for a journey? Anchor."

"I'd like deadlines more if they were called happy endings."

"Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard...."

"So I ordered a pizza I ordered a funghi pizza yesterday but I was pretty disappointed.. They obviously have mushroom for improvement"

"5 and I are playing ""guess the number I'm thinking of"" with no limits and no clues. He's guessing sequentially from 1. Talk next week, guys!"