79752

Joke of the Day

"I can explain the casting for Thor. Norse mythology describes him as a ""hauntingly beautiful blonde lady"""

"How many Zionists does it take to change a light bulb? [OC] Just one. And if you disagree with me, you're an anti-Semite."

"If you drive a Hummer, I will assume you are a douchebag. If aforementioned Hummer is bright yellow, I will crown you their king."

"I'm really starting to hate these little Russian Dolls... They're so full of themselves."

"Why did the skeptic man have high blood pressure? Because he kept taking advice with a pinch of salt!"

"How many Dragonball Z characters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Find out next time, on Dragonball Z!"

"Girls adore it when you guess their weight as they walk by."

"What did Little Bo Peep say to Woody when she got caught screwing Buzz? You got a friend in me."

"""HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU?! Seriously? You're 10 years old."" ""..."" ""Beer before liquor, never sicker. NEVER. SICKER."""

"Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Nevermid, it's too long."