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Joke of the Day

"I recently bumped into a Frenchman wearing a bagel as a scarf. He said it was a real pain in the neck."

"Im absolutely exhausted, would you believe I have spent all week road testing penny farthings..... My feet haven't touched the ground."

"*Meanwhile at a restaurant* Waiter: Welcome sir, would you like a table? Me: So kind of you, I wouldn't mind. *Picks table and walks out*"

"What do you give an alligator who is having trouble hearing? A gator-aid. Bet you did see that one coming:P"

"Men are like vacuum cleaners. They're not much fun but at least you get to push them around."

"Did you hear about the six month old Ethiopian child? He was having a mid life crisis"

"Telephone Problems by Ron Number"

"First blowjob Guy: I got my first blowjob today. Friend: Was she good? Guy: She sucks."

"The name CONstitution sounds so negative. Since 'pro' is the opposite of 'con' we should call it prosti..... oh wait."

"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? 0"