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Joke of the Day

"Oh so everyone praises the movie 'Her' but when I loved my Sims everyone was like ""we're worried"" & ""you've been playing 72 hours straight"""

"If a spider gets bitten by a radioactive teenager does it become super sulky?"

"what's the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair when you're done."

"What do you call a chinese crab who just got dumped? A frustacean"

"Q: How do you have a party in outer space? A: You plan-et."

"If Trump is elected President It won't be the first time he has kicked a black family out of their house."

"I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind."

"I'm very popular at the gym. Girls always approach saying things like, ""Hey, this is the women's locker room."""

"OH HAPPY DAY! GAS WENT DOWN 2 CENTS! Now I can buy my daughter that fancy blue gumball she's always wanted."

"I just got a papercut... we'll just see if I recycle this week... stupid cunt tree."