79289

Joke of the Day

"Making my voice mail message say ""Just hang up and text me."""

"What is a punny play? A play on words."

"So I heard most people who use tinder don't have much furniture in their bedrooms... ...most have one night stand"

"Why did the tree keep getting grounded? Because it was s knotty pine!"

"When did they decide that every razor had to look like a piece that fell off a Transformer?"

"Harry Potter joke Harry Potter can't tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best mate. They're both cauldron."

"What do you call the killing of Chinese baby girls? Youth-in-Asia"

"Did you hear about that Jew that started a charity? Neither did I."

"To the idiots who say ghosts aren't real, maybe you should watch this documentary called Ghostbusters."

"The odds of being killed by a shark are 1 in 3,748,067. So if you know 3,748,066 people who haven't been killed by a shark: avoid the ocean."