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Joke of the Day

"Just saw a girl wearing a ""BAD GAL"" t-shirt so I yelled ""NO!"" & smacked her on the nose with a rolled up newspaper."

"As a child I wanted to be a personal trainer but I ended up as a politician. At least I still convince absolute idiots that change is being made."

"You know what the definition of ""competitive"" is? Finishing first *and* third in a circlejerk."

"How do you disappoint a redditor? Come back when this post is 10 hours old for the results!"

"I had a dream I went to Hell and Satan forced me to sing karaoke with him. That's right, the Devil made me duet."

"I quit my job as a coffee shop manager The daily grind was just too much"

"I invented a new word yesterday Plagiarism"

"An unemployed engineer gets lost while going to a job interview at the navy base Woops, wrong sub."

"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? It looks like you landed on your face"

"If you put a picture of yourself in a locket... Could some say you are, independent? :D (Don't look at me like that. You smirked, at least. haha!)"