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Joke of the Day

"The best thing about fucking 26 year olds is... there's 26 of them."

"Why did the Ape jump off the building? He wanted to show the world the stuff he was made of!"

"What do you call a masturbating cow? Beef strokin-off."

"What do you call a Canadian in a blizzard? Cold."

"Scientists discovered a revolutionary material with infinite length and zero depth ... but then they realized No Man's Sky was invented already."

"You guys hear the one about the Middle Eastern guy? He wanted to be a terrorist but then he'd just falafel."

"want a smart girl, a nice girl, a romantic girl. But most importantly, I want these women to never meet."

"What's the difference between a violin and a fiddle? You can spill your beer on a fiddle."

"Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance. These are the five stages of learning that Ben Affleck is the new Batman."

"Sometimes i think my life sucks. Then i look at the lives of others. Then it hits me. My life does suck!!"