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Joke of the Day

"I just bought a car flag for independence day, for only two dollars.. Now i just need to buy a car, and i am all set."

"Ever since Crystal signed my yearbook in 4th grade, all of my summers have been rad and I haven't changed, just like she asked."

"A woman walks in to a bar and asks the barman for a double entendre So he gave her one."

"Hedgehogs ... Why can't they learn to just share the hedge."

"[my 1st day at press conference sign language translator job I lied on my resume to get] ME: *does Madonna's Vogue choreography for 45 min*"

"Why did the ghost go to the bar? For the BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOze"

"North Korea bans sarcasm What a great idea."

"What does the Cincinnati gorilla story tell us? It's the first time that black-on-black crime made national (even international) news."

"Guys are like bears, if you lay very still they'll paw at you a little bit then give up and go look for food.."

"QUESTION: Name the loser in the 1976 presidential race. ANSWER: The American people."