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Joke of the Day
"Just once I'd like the guy hired to kill me to complete the job and not fall in love with me."
Next Joke
"My trademark fight move is to ask someone very nicely not to hit me or be mean to me."
"I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, ""Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"" I said, ""Wow! Then her friend said, ""She means 666-3629."""
"What's 18 inches long and hangs in front of an asshole? OBAMA'S tie"
"There are so many scams on the Internet now days, but for $19.95 i can show you how to avoid them."
"I almost crashed into the semi in front of me while I was looking at a hot construction worker. That would've been an embarrassing obituary."
"Dear diary, although he was a malevolent killer, the headless horseman was really well dressed. My emotions about this are confusing."
"Today I decided to burn some calories.. So I lit a fat kid on fire."
"What does a Mon Calamari terrorist say? Allahu Ackbar!"
"one small step for man one giant step for a really small man"