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Joke of the Day
"Are you the fourth derivative of a position function? Cause you're a jerk!"
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"Why is George Michaels never gonna dance again? His EKG ain't got no rythym"
"Ever since childhood I've identified as a hippo. While other kids were playing, I savagely mauled villagers. #TransSpecies"
"What did the farmer say after he fed his cows pot? ""the Steaks are high."""
"Nobody has 3 cats. You either have 1 or 2, but from there you leap directly to 17."
"Adulthood is like the part in The Wizard of Oz where Dorothy tries to runaway from her problems, but then SURPRISE, there is also a tornado."
"How is a rabbit similar to a plum? they are both purple, except for the rabbit."
"I had to fire my driver today So now I have all this money, and nothing to chauffeur it."
"What did the Mexican Firefighter name his two children? Jose and Hose B"
"Police are on the look out for a Midget Fortuneteller... He is described as a Small Medium at Large."