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Joke of the Day

"Why were the Native Americans upset when it rained in April? Because April showers, bring May flowers!"

"Why do the Lannisters have such big beds? They pushed two twins together to make a king."

"It's hard to look like a badass when you're slurping on a strawberry smoothie."

"Do you know where my mexican hat is? - It's somewhere bro.. Fine...a sombrero, but what I'm asking is have you seen it?"

"I was arrested yesterday for stealing eggs. I could've sworn they were free range."

"If I can, and you can why Clark Kent?"

"Why do they say ""be there or be square""? because if you are square, you are not around."

"I'm not totally useless, I can be used as a bad example."

"I once farted in an apple store and people got evacuated.. ...because there wasn't any windows."

"What did Santa Claus's wife say during a thunderstorm? 'Come and look at the rain dear.'"