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Joke of the Day

"Pink Fluff... What's pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff What's Blue and Fluffy? Pink Fluff holding it's breath. (My niece told me this)"

"An ex girlfriend of mine had a Cockatoo, that fucking thing would never shut up ... but her bird was cool."

"My girlfriend broke up with me. I am devastated. How could you. I did everything. I surprised you with burgers every night"

"I live in constant fear of accidentally mentioning something I only know about you because I've stalked you on the internet."

"In Hillary's defense. A lot of your friends probably give you $15,000,000 a few times a year and don't expect anything in return."

"Why did the Pilgrims pants keep falling down Because his belt buckle was on his hat ..."

"When is it acceptable to not tip your server? when your a system admin, and your server if tipped could destroy many websites."

"Knock, Knock. > Who's there? > The secret of Comedy. > The secret of Co.. > (interrupting) TIMING!"

"""Try again, dumbass"" - the little red line under your misspelled word"

"America is the greatest country on earth at thinking it's the greatest country on earth."