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Joke of the Day

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? That's not funny."

"Why were the racist oranges upset when they checked out the small phonebook of their new city? Because it was mini apple list."

"What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho Cheese!! (someone date me please)"

"I copied my Match.com bio from a used car website. White Good condition Reliable Cheap No evidence of rear end damage. Must See."

"The best free drug is being super, super tired and then lying down."

"For parents of small children, weekends are about as relaxing as showering with cats."

"Apparently I'm ""an insensitive arsehole"" for referring to my girlfriend's allergic reaction to a box of chocolates (and subsequent fit) as a ""truffle shuffle""..."

"Have you heard about the one-armed super hero? He single handedly stops crime."

"My girlfriend just texted me ""myspacebarisbrokencanyougivemeanalternative?"" Does anyone know what ""ternative"" means?"

"I forgot what I'm allergic to, I'm trying to remember... ..its on the tip of my tongue edit: I made this up haha just thought you'd like it."