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Joke of the Day

"Watch The Walking Dead with someone who's super into it so every time a zombie appears you can pull the old, ""Wait, who's this now?"""

"There is little difference between how a horse eats hay and the way my children consume spaghetti."

"What do you call a female peacock? A peacunt"

"3yr old had a urine test today so we gave him smarties for peeing in a cup. Now he and his brother are pissing in EVERYTHING for more candy."

"What do you call a black woman whose had an abortion? A crimefighter"

"The best way to avoid awkward moments with homeless people is to ask them for money before they ask you."

"An even cornier joke One stalk of corn said to the other stalk of corn, ""Hey, can I tell you something?"" The other stalk of corn said, ""I'm all ears."""

"""Don't move or she's dead"" was the last thing the wife heard before the husband started tap dancing."

"What's the funniest thing you have heard about US Politics? Donald Trump, President of the United States of America"

"Oscar Pistorius found guilty of murder Police say he is now on the run."