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Joke of the Day

"Can't wait to say ""I haven't seen you since last year!"" to everyone I see next week. I'm a very popular person with thousands of friends."

"Why was the man arrested at the farmers' market? He was caught taking a leek."

"Can somebody help me debug Malaysian Flight Simulator? It keeps crashing unexpectedly :/"

"A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine and he said to her ... ""Hey baby, we should bang sometime."""

"Why do abcdefghijklmopqrstuvwxy & z hate hanging out with the letter n? Because n always has to be the center of attention."

"Buddy of mine dropped some acid... Burnt a hole in the floor... He was tripping for days!"

"Definition of a really good friend. What's the difference between a good friend and a really good friend? A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!"

"What's the hardest part about being a gay, black police officer? The discrimination."

"The average person has sex 89 times a year My December is going to be fucking sick"

"A pig with wings walks into a bar. Stunned, the bartender says ""You can't bring food in here from another restaurant! Even if you are a cop!"""