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Joke of the Day

"Q; What do you call two fleas on top of a bald head? A: Homeless."

"Why did Yoda need a stepladder in the chocolate shop? Because he was reaching for a galaxy far, far away."

"How did the dungeon keeper plan for retirement? Collecting stocks and bonds."

"Why are you so pissed? You asked me what turns me on and all I said was you not talking..."

"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problem out with a pencil."

"my friend put me in charge of picking up the wedding cake today LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL RIP CAKE"

"The first rule of denial club is I can stop anytime I want."

"If you are naughty... Santa gives you something hard and black"

"And I really love chocolate... I'm like a chocoholic, but for booze."

"[1620] We Indians will bury the hatchet and teach you to farm. *Pilgrims huddle* It's a ruse, this soil looks awful for growing hatchets."