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Joke of the Day

"When you ask if I want fries or salad, I'll pretend it's a tough choice and we'll enjoy a genial laugh before you bring me more ketchup."

"Wanna feel old? Stacy's mom has had it going on for over 81 years."

"So a deer walks into a gay bar... Two hours and several drinks later, he walks out and says to himself, ""Wow. I can't believe I blew fifty bucks back there..."""

"Q: How do you know if a chef is a clown? A: The food tastes funny."

"Have you heard about the emo pizza? All you do is insult it, and it cuts itself."

"Gather round children, and let me tell ye the story of the black forest ham"

"What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda!"

"Some people say it's not what you know, but who you know... I say it's not who you know, but whom you know."

"Sorry a lot of sand came out of my sleeve when I shook your hand; I went to the beach six years ago."

"ME: Man, I really should get glasses. I'm blind as a-- BAT NEXT TO ME: blind as a what ME: um BAT: as a what ME: BAT: say it"