76156
Joke of the Day
"I have created a new Word! plagiarism"
Next Joke
"Roses are red, Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's To get to the other side"
"*at the movie theater* umm ok the hackers also said theyd do a terror unless u giv me unlimited free popcorn and uh.. also that guys popcorn"
"Hate when you wake up & think it's the weekend but then realise death is inevitable eternal emptiness"
"Instead of ""Juicy"" I have ""May contain gas"" written on the back of my shorts."
"[signing birth certificate] wife: you put Owen, right? me: yup nurse: Now we'll just need a footprint from little [reading] ""Owned"""
"What's green, white, and orange and only appears once a year? Irish pride"
"Seems my bladder still thinks its hilarious to wait until I'm comfortable in bed before voicing it's need to pee."
"My daughter is now at the age where she is asking embarrassing questions about sex. This morning she asked, ""Was that the best you could do?"""
"What's the strongest muscle on a pig? The hamstring."