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Joke of the Day
"The inventor of AutoCorrect... ...is a stupid mass hole. He can fake right off."
Next Joke
"Accidentally used the elephant emoji so thanks, Apple, for the next five hours of fighting"
"Yelling REEEEEMIX, when your boss stutters on a conference call is looked down upon."
"Why don't elephants like martinis? Have you ever tried to get an olive out of your nose?"
"People are lot less judgy when you say you ate an 'avocado salad' instead of a bowl of guacamole."
"What kind of fun does a priest have? Nun."
"Did you hear about the mathematician who hated negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!"
"wife *resting after surgery* me wife me [holding flowers and a Transformers birthday balloon] They didn't have any that said ""Get Well Soon"""
"IAN: I broke my leg once ME: I've never broken a bone, touch wood [touches wood] THE UNIVERSE: THIS MAN WILL NEVER BREAK A BONE"
"What's pun plus pun? Poo"