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Joke of the Day
"Accidentally used the elephant emoji so thanks, Apple, for the next five hours of fighting"
Next Joke
"A rough, hard drinking baseball umpire was upset because he couldn't get his little boy to sit on his lap and talk to him. After all, the son never sits on the brutish umpire."
"if a blonde and a Asian girl would jump off a bridge who would land first? The Asian girl because the blonde would stop and ask for directions."
"*Snoop walks into a classroom* Snoop: Tell me about the Big Bong Theory Teacher: It's the Big Bang Theory *Snoops walks out disappointed*"
"What does a gay horse eat? Dick."
"A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender says, ""You know, we have a drink named after you."" Grasshopper says, ""You have a drink called Steve?"""
"Pigeons... I've just seen a flock of pigeons in army unifoms. I think it might be a military coo."
"Sometimes you just need a cunning linguist to get a tiny pianist joke. [[ Obligatory text]]"
"I hope my last words are something cool like, ""Can I hold your cobra?"""
"*cop approaches me* ""have u seen this girl?"" *holds up photo* ""yeah I've seen her, NAKED"" *hi-5* ""haha but seriously shes in my trunk"""