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Joke of the Day

"My wife has just come home and asked how things went with the baby. Now in mild panic mode as I thought she took the baby along with her"

"What do you say upon hearing a bad Halloween joke? Booooooo, Booooooo"

"My annual performance review says I lack ""passion & intensity"", guess management hasn't seen me alone with a Big Mac."

"I feel so off the grid. I watched the Grampas instead of the Grammys last night."

"three straight men walk in to a bar... and come out."

"What do Volkswagen and a boy going through puberty have in common? They both lie about their emissions."

"This is shit Said the winner of world anagram championship"

"ME: This man's robbing me COP: No he's not M: He was doing it a second ago *puts robber's hand on wallet* come on why aren't you robbing now"

"Feeling pretty good about myself today so I'm going to go meet up with an ex-girlfriend to bring me back down to normal"

"Drunk drivers run stop signs Stones wait for them to turn green."