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Joke of the Day

"Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant, a lot has changed... like my name, phone number, address, etc."

"French bakers hate me... ...I feel their pain."

"Dove: ..then he called me a fat pigeon! [sobs] Prince: ""There there, cry it out"" [starts recording] Um, you are a therapist, right? ""Sure"""

"Why does being a Chinese knight suck? Because everyone always aims for the chink in the armor."

"Frankenstein: Master go fishing? Igor: Yes. F: Master take worms? I: Yes. F: Master put on hook? I: Yup. F: Hehe...Master ba- I: Just don't."

"Worrying does you no good. Or does it? What if it does? Can anyone confirm this? Maybe email me in case I have bad reception?!"

"Pizza is like sex... Its better with the boys"

"Just seen the grave of the woman from 'My Fair Lady'. It says ""Here lies a Doolittle""."

"What's the difference between Santa Claus and Harry Potter? Santa would never free an elf."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my cock up your ass."