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Joke of the Day

"""There are no dumb questions"" is truly the perfect trap for making dumb people reveal themselves."

"My gps got me lost today so I got angry and told it to go to hell. I just arrived at my mother in law's house."

"I'm not saying she's a slut, but she's been banged more than a snooze button on Monday morning."

"GUY: How do you make a living? FRANKENSTEIN: make a living what?"

"The janitor lady for my apartment building asked me out on a date & said she had some weed. I told her I'm not into high maintenance women."

"Just dropped my iPhone in the bath tub. I think it's syncing."

"What's the difference between Hillary's e-mails and the UK leaving the EU? Hillary got off Scott-free."

"I think it's been enough time to warrant a Star Wars spoiler... Yoda is dead"

"My husband had to sign a form stating he understands his mother's cremation is nonreversible. I weep for our species."

"What do you call a nutritionist who sidelines as an automotive journalist? A carb-o-rater"