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Joke of the Day

"I just seen someone update their status on Facebook to ""I Wish Every Guy Was Like Jack From The Titanic."" What... Dead at the bottom of the ocean?"

"I make terrible science jokes... ...but only periodically."

"I just made your acquaintance, and this is preposterous, but here is my address, perhaps thou shall mail me maybe."

"whats the difference between jam and jelly? cant jelly my dick in your ass..."

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virginia mobile"

"How does a one-legged Chinese man walk? He takes a great leap forward."

"Twitter's original name was ""Sentence Contest"""

"I heard Sean Connery's great grandpa was hung for lese-majeste. God, shave the Queen."

"If we both go for the last slice of apple pie at the same time, I will bury my fork in your throat."

"Why did the orange stop in the middle of the road? It ran out of juice."