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Joke of the Day
"How does a one-legged Chinese man walk? He takes a great leap forward."
Next Joke
"So...the past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense."
"What did the ant say when he walked into the insurance office? Insure ants?"
"I'm at my quickest when I try to follow someone out of the bathroom so I don't have to touch the handle."
"Text this to someone: I just love making you check your phone for no reason, who's my bi$ch? You are."
"Hi, you've reached my voicemail. Why are you doing this?"
"My friend handed me broken scissors... I told him this isn't going to cut it."
"Why do girls wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and smell bad."
"Give a man an axe and he'll kill a person. Teach a man how to incorrectly spray on Axe and he'll kill everyone in a 30-ft radius."
"Wanna know what 80 year old pussy tastes like? DependsTM"