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Joke of the Day

"A guy calls his wife to say he's had an accident at the factory He says, ""I got my finger cut off!"" She asks, ""The whole finger?"" He replies, ""No, the one next to it."""

Next Joke
 
"gf: Daddy me: don't call me that it's creepy gf: Sorry Baby me: that's better"
"Where did the Jewish girl go during the bombing? Everywhere."
"A frog parked his car in the handicapped spot. It got toad."
"Inventor displays the first knife ever. His friend, ""that's the greatest invention since bread"" Inventor, ""well I'm about to blow your mind"""
"Two cows standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly: ""I was artificially inseminated this morning."" ""I don't believe you,"" replies Dolly. ""It's true, no bull!"""
"I just flew in from Nova Scotia and boy, are my arms tired... From jacking it in first class the whole way."
"Why does KFC only sell christian chicken? Because the muslim ones are on the no-fry list."
"Why did the professional poker player season his meat with marijuana? Because he wanted his steaks high."
"Why wasn't Caitlyn Jenner charged with vehicular manslaughter? It wasn't her fault. Her tranny slipped."