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Joke of the Day

"WebMD says pregnancy symptoms are fatigue, tender breasts, irritability, cravings, and headaches. All chicks are pregnant. All. The. Time."

"It's orange, it says it's an orange, but it's not an orange. What is it? A tangerine with a big mouth."

"A poop joke. How did the coprophilic marine respond when asked what the most important thing in life was? Duty. Honor."

"nurse: are you allergic to any medicine? me: laughter nurse: hahaha. OH MY GOD- me [face swelling up]: i thold thou."

"Why are fire trucks red? You would be too if someone was pulling on your hose all day."

"Why did the chicken cross the road To get too the other side lmao memeboi"

"Why do Jews stay home during the summer? They don't like going to camps."

"How do you make a dog float? Take two scoops of ice cream a couple of squirts of soda and a small dog."

"What's a neckbeard's favorite pie? Lemon m'ringue pie"

"Why don't ducks become doctors? They are afraid of accusations of quackery"