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Joke of the Day
"""I shit you not"" - Yoda claiming dibs on the bathroom"
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"Who are the real Guardians of the Galaxy? Security at Samsung."
"What do John Belushi, Jim Morrison, John Candy, Jimi, Hendrix, and Janice Joplin have in common? They all died Jung."
"Politicians and diapers have one thing in common: they should both be changed regularly... and for the same reason."
"The nice thing of living in a small village is that when you don't know what you're doing someone else does."
"What's the difference between circus and strip club? Circus is full of cunning stunts."
"""Excuse me shopkeep, where are your Terminators?"" ""Aisle B, back""."
"""Gotham deserves a relaxed hero that smells of lavender."" - Bathman"
"If your partner says ""if anything happens to me, I want you to meet someone new,"" ""anything"" doesn't include getting stuck in a traffic jam"
"When your mate says his name is Stephen with a 'ph' to the cashier and he gets his Starbucks cup back reading 'PHEVEN'. That."