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Joke of the Day

"How many animals can you fit in a pair of pantyhose...? 10 little piggies, 2 calves, a beaver, a clam, an ass, some hares, and a fish that no one can seem to find"

"Good news: Your wit is really mind-blowing Bad news: It's not my mind that I want blown"

"A musician, a lumberjack, and a mathematician were in a room together... They made a log-rhythm."

"1: Acquire scuba gear. 2: Strap duck decoy to head. 3: Dive in local pond. 4: Enjoy unlimited free bread crumbs."

"Do you know why they call it the Xbox One? Because you take one look and walk away."

"Who makes the lemonade at a hospital? A Fizzy-o-Therapist."

"I like my women like I like my clothesline. Strung out and tied up."

"Do you know if pigs have periods?' Are you kidding me? What idiot would keep a pig until she's 14?'"

"I'm not a huge fan of Carrot Top.. ..but I give him props!"

"How can Euchre and Marriage be similar? Sometimes you start out all hearts and diamonds, but end up wishing you had a club and a spade."