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Joke of the Day

"My friends think I'm weird for sleeping with a full size body pillow It's just a lot more rare to find a dead midget."

"I can make you speak Irish Say ""Whale oil beef hooked"" quickly"

"People say I don't have what it takes Yeah, because every time I get it, it takes it."

"What do you call a medieval dentist? A plaque doctor."

"My mom: Asians are some of the safest people in the world... Me: There are asian gangs too My mom: And they're called study groups!"

"What's the difference between a pile of dead babies, and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage."

"What did the man in the ""Race for a Cure"" say to the three people beside him? ""we're walking four abreast."""

"what did the drummer say to the Chinese man that called him gay? first i bang the drums then i bang ur mom"

"Putting juice in the fridge is fine but put it in the oven and you're literally Hitler"

"Hey, Sean Bean, it's either pronounced Shaun Baun or Seen Bean. You can't have it both ways."