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Joke of the Day
"My therapist picked a cool time to go on vacay I'm making decisions out here like a wild animal"
Next Joke
"Early to bed, early to rise makes people suspicious."
"What is the difference between a Greek spearman and a pale beer? One is hoplite, and the other a light hops."
"Vanna White's birthday is today... Pretty soon she'll be getting to the age where she has trouble with her vowel movements."
"Everyone around me keeps telling me I'm mean. Which is absurd. Plus, they're ugly."
"A priest, a rapist and a pedophile walk into a bar He buys a beer."
"On the one hand, when I masturbate, I feel like I'm cheating on my wife... ...but on the other hand, I don't."
"69'd the wife then went to buy donuts after. The guy at the counter said he already knew what I wanted, so I asked how..... He said ""You had 'glazed' all over your face. """
"Why did the bullet stay home? Because it got fired!"
"Why are blondes bad a judging distance? They have no idea what 12 inches actually looks like. I for some reason could not find a way to phrase this any better. Credit to my coworker."